The 8 types of user
Number 3 The Miracle Worker
Most likely to say: 'Well I had Word, Notes, the sales and marketing database, Excel, Powerpoint, Photoshop, Navigator and Doom II all open simultaneously yesterday and everything was fine. I can't imagine why my machine has crashed now ...'
Advantages: Apparently has remarkable luck when support staff aren't around.
Disadvantages: Gets very angry when support staff point out that they couldn't possibly have done something that they think they have done (like you're calling them a liar instead of just stupid).
Symptoms: Loses all ability to do the impossible when you're around.
Hey, either systems staff give off high-intensity radiation that suddenly stops their computer behaving 'normally', or the PC has worked out how to play practical jokes.
Real Case: At least three users in one department claimed that they'd loaded Wordperfect for Windows from Macintosh disks. If only life was really like that ...
Top 10 similarities between system administrators & Santa
1. Santa is bearded, corpulent, and dresses funny.
2. When you ask Santa for something, the odds of receiving what you wanted are infinitesimal.
3. Santa seldom answers your mail.
4. When you ask Santa where he gets all the stuff he's got, he says, 'Elves make it for me'.
5. Santa only cares about one deadline - his.
6. Your parents ascribed supernatural powers to Santa, but did all the work themselves.
7. Nobody knows who Santa has to answer to for his actions.
8. Santa laughs entirely too much.
9. Santa thinks nothing of breaking into home (PC) and having a snoop around.
10. Only a lunatic says bad things about Santa in his presence.
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