Living, as we surely do, in enlightened times it is no longer strictly necessary to book an illicit weekend away under the saucy pseudonym of Mr and Mrs Smith. However, Sneak for one is ready to reinstate the practice after news reaches him from the US that auditor Ernst & Young has managed to have a laptop stolen with the personal details of 243,000 Hotels.com customers. Adopting a pseudonym and paying in cash now seem like quite sensible ideas. Sneak is not so worried about stern lectures from bible-basking B&B owners, nor the threat that incompetent auditors might have handed Sneak’s address to criminals unknown. No, the more worrying prospect is that Mrs Sneak might get hold of a leaked list of hotel bookings and realise that Sneak’s frequent “foreign business trips” are spent at a nearby Holiday Inn, where there is wireless internet access, a telly, and no washing up, no DIY, and no gardening to be done.

06 Jun 2006