In a new advert from Microsoft, Laptop Hunters #1, subject Lauren goes in search of a laptop with "speed, a comfortable keyboard, and a 17in screen" for under $1,000. A voiceover from Microsoft informs the viewer: "We told her, you find it, you keep it", so off she goes. To an Apple Store.

Perhaps unsurprisingly Lauren, who has a voice that could grate cheese, is disappointed. She lurches out of the store announcing that the only free laptop she could have had from there had a 13in screen. What does she expect for $1000? Never mind for FREE? A gold-encrusted laptop that churns out angels and pixies while others spit out CFCs? A Hello Kitty model? Who knows, we'd already tired of Lauren by the time she announced, "I'm just not cool enough to be a Mac person".

So off she marches to another store. There she compares a normal sized laptop to a phone, says that another one has all of her qualifications - such as an A/S level in kookiness? - and makes a number of screeching noises before choosing an HP Pavilion.

"Congrats Laura, it's a PC", says the voiceover, before Laura pipes up again with "I'm a PC and I got just what I wanted".

Well, you got a free laptop. Who would complain?

30 Mar 2009